My Protector
by jjrw1998
Summary: Every human must have a protector vampire, but what will the next chain of events bring to Morganville? *clyrnin* -BLACK DAWN SPOILERS-
1. Chapter 1

The letter looked official, a manila envelope, curved writing. It could only be from Amelie, I swallowed as I carefully picked mine up. There were three on the table, one for me, Shane and Eve. I hoped it wasn't something to horrific.

Carefully opening the envelope I pulled a thick sheet of paper out, it had a watermark that was Amelie's seal. I shivered as I opened and read it.

_Dear Claire,_

_As you know there are to be certain changes within our town. _

_One of these changes affects all humans within the resident population. _

_Every human must have a protector vampire, who has chosen to protect said person. _

_This is not up for any negotiation, should you have an extreme problem then _

_You may contact me through the appropriate channels._

_Amelie._

I carefully laid the sheet of paper on the table, and looked at the small envelope nestled inside the first. Taking a deep breath I pulled it open, hoping against hope it would be at least agreeable. Somehow.

_Dear Claire,_

_This is your bracelet of which will bind you to your protector. Please put it on immediately, _

_Worry not over the sensation, for your is a most special contract, worry not._

_Name of protector: Myrnin Conwy_

_Location: -_

_Age: -_

I let out a slightly shocked breath, Myrnin was my new protector? I pulled out the bracelet and was surprised at it. It was gold, with his name emblazoned on it. Looking for a clasp, I couldn't find one. I wondered slightly about how the hell I was a) going to put it on and b) how I was going to tell Shane?

I was sure he'd go ballistic, but did I truthfully think that would classify as an extreme problem? No, besides it could be worse. Looking down at the cool bracelet in my hand I pulled it slightly, and it stretched, of course. Pulling it, like an elastic band, round my wrist, it settled and glowed red hot before cooling, I could feel it shrinking to fit my wrist before something pierced my skin.

I winced, looking at my wrist as a small bead of blood dropped from it onto the gold, which absorbed it before again burning white hot. I winced and looked at my wrist, before feeling something strange, like… almost like when I'd had those crystals, like I was being on cloud nine, in Myrnins mind when he'd brought me back. Too much, too much. Far too much…

It stopped, so suddenly. I blinked and it was done, it was fast, sure, but still, it hurt, like a dull ache inside of me. I could feel my heart beating, my mind racing without words. Falling backwards onto the wall I took deep breaths, trying to stop the spinning of my mind, and head. Nothing was blurry, I wasn't blind, but I couldn't see. My eyes were hurting, my head was aching…

I dimly felt my body hit the floor…

Ooo

"Shush, you'll wake her."

"So what? Mike! I can't believe you didn't fight for her too!"

"Eve, shut up. Of course I tried to fight for her, but Amelie was adamant that an older vampire wanted her, and frankly I quite agree."

"Michael! How could you? What if it's Oliver? Or Worse…"

"It's not, can't you see her wrist? Myrnin is, and good for him, he can protect her."

"Michael, he was willing to leave her as bait for Magnus…"

"I know, but look, Eve, shush, he can protect her, people don't like Claire, for siding with us, and the other vamps won't dare bite her with his mark. I mean look at her, she'll be fine. She put the bracelet on."

"How do you know?"

"Because, that's the only way these bracelets work, by putting them on yourself, with no other help, you are accepting your protector."

"So, does that mean that you're mine, always?"

"Yes, Eve, and Shane too, just not in that way…"

Eve laughed and I felt her move from the perch on my bed to the door. I don't know why, I just did, and it was scary, really scary.

Ooo

The canopy above my head was different, somehow. Were these sheets always this itchy? I wasn't sure, somehow.

"It's different for you, isn't it Claire?" my head whipped to the side and there he was. Not Shane, no, I knew that he hadn't been in my room in weeks, but Myrnin, casually sat on my bed, smiling, his maniac smile brighter, somehow.

"What do you mean?" I said, sitting up.

"I mean, everything feels slightly different, more intense…"

"No," I said almost automatically, what did he mean?

"Yes, Claire, yes."

"I don't understand." I said, and I saw him smile, his eyes glowing.

"This room is pitch black Claire, if Eve stepped in here, or Collins then they would be unable to see anything. You however are just looking at me,"

"What?" I said, my mind beginning to un-fog, slightly, He sighed,

"Claire, that bracelet is a connection to me, and I am a vampire. Because I am essentially brilliant, some of my brilliance has transmitted through the bracelet to mark you. Meaning you can now have some slight tendencies you didn't have already. Like better feeling, these sheets, cotton are they? They feel scratchy, everything brighter."

"So, I'm like some sort of vamp?" I said, blinking at him, he smiled, slightly.

"I suppose, except you do need both food and sleep, and no you needn't drink blood, unless you suddenly have a sudden burning desire to know what it tastes like." He smiled at the end, and took my hands in his own, they were freezing. "And, this also means your brain has been able to open itself more, meaning you are now, more intelligent, I suppose you could say."

"Really?" I said, not caring that his hands were inclosing mine, or that his chocolate eyes seemed alight in the dimness of the room.

"Yes, Claire. Now, sleep and when you wake again, say nothing of my visit, or your new found abilities." He smiled and suddenly he was by my window.

"Why?"

"We wouldn't want to aggravate young Mr. Collins any further, would we?" He said, chuckling darkly before disappearing out the window. I leaned back and felt myself begin to itch, making a mental note to think about new sheets I fell asleep, my mind filled with overly bright dreams, and the sound of his laugh.

_**WOW. I wasn't sure where this would end up, so anyway, please read and review, and I'll update.**_

_**In fact, I'll probably update almost straight away.**_


	2. Chapter 2

It was early when I woke up, I could tell. The light filtering through the curtains was barely there, I groaned and rolled over. Only to become irritated, almost at once, because of the scratchy sheets. Damn, no more sleep for this girl then. Sitting up I dragged myself out of bed and grabbed some clothes and a towel, before silently slipping out to the bathroom.

"And where do you think you're going?" came the unmistakable voice of Micahel, from behind me. Turning round I answered,

"Bathroom, you?" I said.

"It's 4:30 in the morning, go back to bed Claire." He said smiling at me, I smiled back and tried to stop looking at those abs, sure I had Shane, and god his was hot as, but Michael was all icy perfection.

"Can't sleep, and hey, why are you up?" I said, raising an eyebrow, even though I'd never been able to do that before in my entire life.

"Same theory." He said, smiling at me, before turning and walking away,

"Have a good shower," he said, before sloping back to his room. Smiling I opened the bathroom door and walked inside, my feet touching the cold floor…

Ooo

Standing in my room I was at a loss, what should I wear? I was just going to the lab, but somehow, I wasn't sure, but I felt I should wear something different, slightly better then my normal worn clothes. Pulling out a pair of black leggings I pulled them on before pulling on a smock like dress. Sure, it wouldn't win any awards for fashion, but it was comfy, and I had a feeling I'd need it. Pulling on my worn converse, I walked downstairs and had breakfast.

It was still far too early but I decided to go to the lab anyway, I wasn't tired, besides I felt almost compelled to go there, for some reason. Popping a mint in, I summoned a portal before stepping through.

It was dark in the lab, and the thick curtain of silence that cloaked it was almost vibrating with energy, feeling my way along the wall I flicked the switch and was met by the bright lights of the lab. It was empty, completely.

"Myrnin?" I said, walking in, placing my backpack on the table and pulling out a stake- you never knew what you could find.

"Myrnin?" I said a bit louder, before hearing it echo around the lab,

"Myrnin?" I shouted walking through the lab, slightly irritated, slightly worried. If he wasn't here, then were exactly was he?

"Claire?" Came a faint voice, from somewhere in the lab, damn the vast room.

"Myrnin? Where are you?" I shouted, looking around.

"My bedroom, hurry Claire…" I gulped, and took a deep breath before looking for the secret switch that would reveal the door. It was behind a dead spider and a book, which I had to move, so how did he get in?

Walking into the room, I was surprised to see it was dimly lit, I'd only ever been it once before, it was richly decorated and there was Myrnin, hanging upside, a stake carefully shoved through his heart, or near to his heart at least. I think I must have gasped because he rolled his eyes before chuckling,

"It seems someone has a vendetta against me being your protector, little one."

"Why do you say that? And who did this?" I asked, walking round him, trying to think of the best way to get him down, or pull the stake out.

"Because he told me in length, after he'd staked me about why he was doing it, and why I should stay away from you. And before you ask it was that charming Collins boy, unfortunately his aim isn't as good as he might have hoped, you see he didn't puncture all my heart, only half of it, or so. Also, the silver within it is very slow in spreading."

"Shane did this?" I shrieked gaping up at him,

"Yes, now will you please remove the stake—" He looked at me, his eyes pleading for me to do it quickly, "just pull it out, there a good girl." I nodded and stood in front of him, and took hold of the end. It was cold and wooden, obviously, but I felt slightly feeble. I wasn't strong, and this seemed to be lodged deep, or so I guessed from the blood that had pooled on Myrnin's chest.

"On three perhaps?" Myrnin said, looking at me, over his shirt that was hanging over him, his six pack clearly defined…

"Ok… one, two, three!" I yanked it out with a gasp, falling back into the dresser.

"Thank you." Myrnin said helping me up, he had managed to untie the knots… he was a wonder.

"Your welcome, why did he do it?"

"I think he made it quite clear, he said, and I quote 'I don't like you owning my girlfriend leech, so if you die, and then I suppose I won't have that problem, will I?' I think it was a truly ill-conceived plan, personally. I suppose, it could have worked, but it would have been more effective to stab me with pure silver, and a stake, and hang me in sunlight, and spray me with silver also…"

"Myrnin when you've finished telling me how you've planned your suicide,"

"Well, if I was to plan my own death, I would make it a show Claire! A spectacular mystery with so many twists and plot turn that I dare say only you could figure it out!"

I had to chuckle at that, he was dramatic,

"I'm sure you would, but would you like anything?" I said, slightly awkwardly,

"Ahh, no thank you Claire, I believe I am fine." He said, but he too looked slightly awkward.

"Sure?" I asked,

"Positive." He said, before disappearing into the lab, shutting the door behind him. Well, alright then! Sighing I walked back into the lab to see Myrnin gulping several bag of blood, his eyes a frenzied mess. I could feel it, the swallow, the quenching, and it felt so weird, so terribly wrong, but just so right. I could feel something that I constituted for pre-period cramps fade, and die. I realised it was bunger, bare primal thirst.

I shudder as he looked at me, and I felt his mind sharpen, the bag dropped to the floor.

"I thought you'd take longer." He said, moving through the room with deadly longevity.

"Well, you were obviously wrong…" I replied, swallowing before glancing back up at his eyes.

"_Yes, I do rather suppose I was…"_

_**THANK YOU FOR ALL THE EPIC REVIEWS! I very much appreciate them! Please review!**_

_**xxx**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**OMG! Thank you so much for all the reviews! ;D Also, it half-term so I may update more now, for a week and a bit at least **___

CPOV:

I was finally tired, and that in itself was hard. It had been _three_ days with minimal sleep, and I was shattered. The dratted sheets had kept me awake, almost all night, and now I was finally feeling it.

"Claire?" Myrnin said, and I realised that I had just been staring at the bubbling blue file for ten solid minutes, not thinking. Well, that was productive.

"Sorry, I guess I just kinda zoned out…" I said, yawning slightly. He quirked an eyebrow and replied,

"Yes, you did, for-" he checked his pocket watch "-ten minutes and thirty-two seconds, of which I have valiantly been trying to snap you out of it, for four minutes."

"Sorry, I'm just," I yawned, "_really_ tired…" I said, trying to keep a straight face as his cracked into a smirk.

"How tired?" he replied, before running of somewhere, he returned holding a vial of sleeping pills and a bottle of water,

"Tired, but not _that_ tired." I replied, it wasn't I was adverse to taking sleeping pills, but they had obviously come from a cupboard, and the water, well I didn't really want to follow that thought through.

"Why ever not? I've been assured that they work very well." He replied, holding out the bottles.

"Because, I'm not sure they'd really work?"

"Nonsense, you distrust the cleanliness of the water, and the validity of the pills, correct?"

"Well…"

"I'll take that as an affirmative then, very well, I have another idea."He said, before running off to yet another part of the lab, I blinked dazedly and flopped onto a nearby lab stool, after haphazardly pushing the books off it.

"You are obviously not sleeping, because your bed is uncomfortable, correct?" He said, returning with a huge bundle of purple fabric in his hands.

"Yes, how did you know?"

"Ask me not a question such as that, and I shalt not tell you a lie." He replied, seriously before grinning. "In any reality is the bond we share because I am your protector, I unfortunately can feel your tiredness and have been querying the problem in my spare time. I came to this conclusion." He said, before throwing the contents of his arms at me.

They hit me in the face, the soft smell of lavender radiating off them and hitting my nose. They were soft, really soft, and felt, really expensive.

"Silk sheets?" I asked, looking up from the dark colour to see his face smiling at me,

"Yes, many vampires find cotton, or any other fibres such as that irritating, and judging from you lack of sleep, I judged that you to may be facing the same problem, because of I. I felt it only right to find you some appropriate sheets." He replied, smiling before returning to his experiments. "Now, I daresay you should return to your peers, I shall see you in the morning, hopefully refreshed."

I turned to go to the portal and said, just as I stepped through,

"Thanks, Myrnin."

"You're welcome little one." He replied, smiling I closed the portal and shivered, the house was cold again. It was always cold now.

Ooo

"You don't own me Shane!" I shouted, fuming. How dare he demand I stop working for Myrnin?

"Isn't it enough for him to own you, but for you to work with him too? Can't you see why I'm worried?" Shane shouted back, throwing his hands around.

"He doesn't own me!" I shouted, throwing my hands up in the air too.

"He might as well do, he asks you to jump and you say how high? God, Claire, can't you see that he wants to control you?"

"No, Shane, no I can't."

"You see Claire, you blinded!" Shane cut in, prick.

"You didn't let me fucking finish! I can't see it, because it's a lie, he doesn't want to control me! You do!" I screamed, a few tears slipping out. I suddenly felt so angry, so angry I could just… do what? Something drastic, it looked as if he was feeling the same.

"I don't want to own you Claire, I want you to love me!" He shouted back, approaching me, he was red in the face, his voice loud and vicious.

"Well, you should have thought about that before you went and stabbed my boss!"

"you see Claire, that's all you care about, boss this, Myrnin that! I'm your fricking boyfriend, not him!" He shouted, pushing me up against the wall, he'd caught me of guard, and suddenly I didn't feel so strong, his face red and sweating near mine, a pulse throbbing in his temple. I felt weak, and he knew it.

"Not feeling so powerful now, are you? Please will you just listen, now?"

"No, Shane, you're just lying and being an idiot." I replied, looking him dead in the eye.

"Really Claire? Am I really being an idiot?" He asked, his voice a deadly quite.

"Yes, look at you! This isn't love! You fucking stabbed Myrnin and left him to die! That's murder Shane? How can I trust you?"

"Murder? They're already dead Claire!" He spat at me, his grip painfully tight on my shoulders.

"Shane let go." I said, staring at him dead in the eye.

"No, not ever, I will never let go of this, never."

Ooo

I could feel something, something happening inside the house, I was in my room, trying to shake of the sadness that was drowning me. My shoulders were bruised, and red, but I didn't care. It was the emotions, too much. Everything felt raw, open and bleeding. How could he be so…nasty? I laughed at myself, _nasty_, that was the best I could come up with? I sighed and stood from the chair and glanced at the bed. I'd finally made it minutes before but had been unable to rest in it, just yet.

Somehow, it felt wrong, to lie in a bed that the sheets were Myrnin's. God knew what he'd done with them, but they felt so soft, and nice. Sighing I undressed and redressed in my bed clothes, an overly large t-shirt and a pair of leggings- it was getting colder after all. Opening up the bed I snuggled in and felt instantly at peace, I had just enough time to realise that the lavender was actually a drug I'd inhaled before I fell asleep, a smile dazedly plastered on my features.

Ooo

"When did you get these then?" Came a distinctly masculine voice, loud and angry. Shane, it had to be. I sighed and opened my eyes, firstly wondering what on earth he was on about, and why he was in my room so early, 4am? He was never up this early.

"What?" I said groggily.

"When did you get these fancy sheets? Cotton not good enough for you?" He snarled, and I suddenly realised I was in the purple sheets, feeling more rested then I had in a while, and here he was _ruining _it.

"Who bought you them?"

"Did you get them recently, answer me Claire!" he whisper shouted, approaching the bed and angrily fisting the fabric in his hand.

"Shane, get out." I answered before rolling over and trying to feign sleepiness.

"What?" It was obviously not going to work.

"I was in the process of sleeping, and since it is 4:04am, and far too early for you to be up, I say that perhaps you should do the same." I replied, sitting up, somewhat badly.

"Well, so was I, until I needed a piss and heard you murmuring in your sleep, I thought I'd come in and talk to you, and there you were, in these fancy new sheets? Care to explain?" He asked, his bare chest glinting in the moonlight streaks from my window.

"I got new sheets, I am was sleeping, you decided to go for a wee, wanted to see me sleep, like some stalker, saw my new sheets and had a go at me. Is that alright?" I said, sarcasm obvious.

He spluttered before letting go of the sheets and stalking out the door, slamming it behind him.

Needless to say I didn't fall asleep again.

_And who's bloody fault was that?_

_**Voila! Please review! **_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Firstly, I'm so sorry I didn't update over half term, I'm a terrible person, I know. But thank you all so much for the reviews, they made me smile and really happy. So I decided that YES; it may be 5 o'clock, and my eyes are tired; but I shall UPDATE!**_

_**Enjoy:**_

CPOV:

Despite the fact Shane had woken me up; I had managed to drift back off to sleep, fitfully. It was rest I needed, but rest that it seemed had come at a terrible price. Sitting up I felt first the after effects of the drug kicking in; damn Myrnin for drugging me. But, then again they had been pleasant dreams, not that I could remember them. Sitting up I stretched and immediately regretted it, the cold air hit my like a hammer, making me shiver slightly.

Climbing out of bed I pulled out some clothes before running into the bathroom, the steam would help warm me up. It seemed I was first up, like always, the bright gold of my bracelet gleaming in the light as I washed my hair. Stepping out of the shadow I dried the dripping ends of my hair before changing into my usual jeans ensemble and returning back to my room. Smiling at myself, always the optimist, I combed my hair out and quickly dried it, it seemed I'd woken up early enough to do it.

Walking down the cold stairs I went into the kitchen and had some cereal, I wasn't in the mood for pop tarts, not today anyway. Glancing at my watch I realised that I needed to speed up, running up the stairs I was in the bathroom cleaning my teeth and I had no idea how. No idea at all.

OoO

College was boring as always, everything was boring compared to the draug and Myrnin's eccentric lessons. Chemistry was boring, basic almost, compared to the lessons Myrnin had to teach me. My mind was consumed with him, and that was worrying. Staring at the board as the teacher droned on I found myself wondering what would happen if I just walked out, laughing. I could see it in my mind's eye, the look on their faces as I did so.

So, I did.

They looked shocked, the teacher shouting at me to come back in now. I only laughed louder. I supposed this was what it mean to be mad. Mad like Myrnin. It felt odd, light, as if I was suddenly completely free of social constraint. It was enlightening, the only thought of why was something to do with good sleep, this link to Myrnin (he was mad after all) and the drug he given me to inhale from the sheets.

Sauntering to common grounds I sat at a table, a mocha in my hand as I looked at all the vampires staring at me, in fear. And I had no idea why, no idea at all. But, it was still funny. So funny, I began laughing in earnest then, and the entire populace of the room glanced round at me. It was invigorating.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Came a loss hiss as Shane sat next to me, his shaggy hair swinging around his angry face.

"Laughing, or I was, now I suppose you could say I'm talking to you." I replied, staring at him, just as he was staring at me.

"Shut the fuck up Claire. I mean now, you've got classes." He hissed across at me. He was ruining my mood, and I wasn't ready to let it go quite yet.

"I know, I thought I'd ditch them today, Myrnin's classes are so much more educational." I said as he gaped at me.

"Claire, are you alright?" He said, frowning.

"No, half left!" I said, laughing hysterically at my own joke. And then I suddenly felt. Nothing.

"What? Claire, I'm serious."

"So, am I." I replied, no hint of joking within my tone as I looked at him.

"Fine then, Go see your precious Myrnin then." He replied before standing up and brushing ym half drank mocha over the table.

"Prick." I shouted after him.

He didn't even look back at me.

And suddenly any mood I didn't have came crashing back to me, sadness, depression, fear, happiness. All together.

I had to see Myrnin now, before I did something worse, but it was just so fun! No it wasn't, came a voice inside my mind.

I was talking to myself.

God help me.

Iii

By the time I stumbled into the lab I was in crying hysterics, my entire body shaking from the strength of my sobs.

"Claire?" Came a concerned voice from behind me. "What on this earth is the matter?" He guided me over to the sofa, his worried face close to mine.

"I don't know."

"I see, stay here." He said, removing his hands from my shoulders.

He was back and holding a bubbling liquid.

"To get rid of your mood swings, don't worry; it's perfectly safe." I raised an eyebrow but took it anyone. It tasted disgusting but then all I felt was peace then normality crash onto me.

"Better?"

"Yeah thanks, what is it?"

"It's a calming concoction I use myself when my emotions become too bothersome. I often use it, so I know it is very safe."

"Why are my emotions unstable?" I asked, staring at him as he paced.

"I would presume it is because of the link we share, but it could be a chemical inbalance caused by the sleeping lavender from the sheets."

"Oh…then why are your emotions unstable?"

"That Claire, is a very good question. But, one which I cannot answer. Sometimes they are, how would you say? Haywire. Other times they are just normal, sedated." He said, looking off into the distance.

"Oh, so what are we working on today then?" I asked, keen, as always, for knowledge.

"Hmm, how does the alchemical substance of life sound?" He replied, before running to a lab table and sitting down.

I rose to join him.

Oooo

_**2 months later**_

Shane was shouting at me, and it seemed, like it _always_ did, that my heart was about to explode from the pain he was putting it through.

"Shut up!" I screamed at him, my shrill voice seeming to echo around the room.

"Why should I? You always talk about him, so why can't I talk about her?"

"Because I'm not fucking cheating on you with him, that's why?"

"Really? I don't think that fang-bangers like you really deserve someone like me, but I'm still hanging onto you- for your reputation." He said smirking, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Get out Shane." I said, he smirked, but complied. It seemed this was what happened all the time now, whenever we were left alone. When we were with Eve and Michael we were perfect, a façade so they didn't see the cracks. But, alone, we were shattering, falling apart: and it was breaking me apart.

Shuffling over to the cabinet I pulled out the pills Myrnin and I had made to keep me calm, to dull the pain and emotion. He hadn't even asked why, and that was why I loved working for him, he never asked questions like: _where did that bruise come from? Why have you been crying? Have you lost weight?_ He just got on with it and tried to help. And this was one of those ways.

He didn't know how much the pills affected me. I was addicted to having them now, to taking them, and feeling all my emotions disappear. But, I couldn't let it last, never. Taking a deep breath I pulled out the red tablets we'd developed to get me out of the emotionless haze I let myself fall into. They got rid of the other drug in my system by burning it out; but it made me feel, something that wasn't heartbreak. I could only be grateful for that.

A slim tear slipped from my cheek as I looked at the other pills in the cabinet. There were enough there, I knew there were. But I wasn't ready yet.

_Was I?_

_**Review please **___


	5. Chapter 5

_For Becky, because she needs inspiring._

_**Sorry, I haven't updated. But, I just read all the reviews I've got so thank you to each and every one of you who gave me one! Anyway, here we go:**_

CPOV:

It seemed I was ready, because somehow I didn't feel like doing anything yet. Like going to work, like doing anything; like bothering. I'd lost interest in things that used to motivate me, I had no motivation, I felt so down all the time, I felt distressed. I felt depressed.

I didn't meant to feel it anymore, but that was the problem. I had become intolerant to the drug, I couldn't have any more. It wasn't making any difference. I was still feeling.

And feeling hurt.

Feeling this bad.

Feeling so much pent up anger, pain, unhappiness, helplessness.

I knew it was a stupid thing to do the second I picked up the razor from the cabinet in the bathroom.

But somehow I was,

"Claire? Are you in the bathroom?" Eve said, from outside the door.

"Yeah, sorry, do you need it?" I said, my voice shook slightly.

"Nah, I'm good. Are you alright CB?" she said, and I heard the concern in her voice, the way she spoke I opened my mouth,

"She's fine, probably just staring at herself in the mirror." Shane said, I could hear the snide remarks in his tone.

"I'm fine Eve." I was a mess, restless, sad, unhappy, most likely depressed.I heard their footsteps fade away.

My fate was sealed.

I stared at the pink razor, it had two blades, each one sharp enough to do some damage.

I carefully rubbed it against my wrist.

Nothing happened, except a faint stinging sensation. A stinging sensation that hurt, but somehow drowned everything else out.I dragged it against my skin again, the pain intensified slightly.

And again.

No cut had appeared yet, stupid women's razor.

I put the razor back, the only sign on my wrist I'd done anything a faint redness.

I sat on the toilet, the realisation hitting me.

I'd just purposely self harmed.I'd just tried to hurt myself.

I looked at my wrist, and there were two small cuts on my wrist, were I'd dragged it across.

They stung, and they were bleeding slightly.

I stared in fascination at the beads of blood, before taking a piece of toilet roll and holding it to the two oozing cuts.

I'd just self harmed.

And suddenly I felt guilty, and then I felt better, because I didn't feel so bad, and then I smiled.

Because I wasn't feeling so bad anymore- what was wrong with me?

000

The lab was dark, darker then I'd thought it could be.

And I couldn't find the light switch; damn.

Stumbling around I soon hit a table and tried to find my bearing, having walked downstairs I'd come hit a table, at the bottom of the stairs. I couldn't find a reason in my head why a table was here, and the lights hadn't switched on. Well this was just fine and dand-

"Why is there a cut on your wrist?" He said, my hand already ensnared in his grip.

"What?" I said, trying to see him in the darkness, his pupils were so big I couldn't see his eyes.

"Why have you an intercession upon your wrist Claire? Do not lie, I can smell it, I can feel it." He said, dragging me over the table to stand in front of him.

I could feel his strong grip on my wrist, I could feel how fast my heart was beating.

"Because." I said, my voice sounding sadder then I thought it should. His grip left my wrist and the lights turned on, flickering on. He was stood by the switch, his eyes were dark, his face unsure. It made me sad to think it was him, not Shane that cared.

Sad, but with a strange bubble inside me.

"I felt you cut your wrist Claire, I felt the pain. I felt your body scream out as you did it. Why did you?" He said, standing in front of me, his face mere inches from mine.

"Because it made me feel better." I whispered.

I was crushed to his chest, the smell that was him wafting through my nostrils. Old, masculine, new, chemical Myrnin.

I felt myself lift ads I inhaled his scent, his arms wrapped around me in a protective hug. I hesitantly wrapped mine round him to, I felt him stiffen slightly, before relaxing into it, his head resting on mine.

"Why did you do it Claire?"

"It made me feel less, the drugs don't work anymore." I said, he sighed and pulled back, staring at my face. His eyes were pensive, sad. But still there.

He looked down at me, and then his lips were suddenly on mine and all I felt was surprise…

_And then I couldn't fell anything except his lips on mine; bliss._

_**Voila! It's not that long, but I can't force it to write itself, my inspiration has dried up somewhat; please review!**_


End file.
